MY BALLS ARE SURELY FRIED...

For all those folks who continue to believe that our Ozone Layer isn't riddled with holes a la some Mafia movie -- may the sun place hefty cancerous boils upon your neck, chest and back. Record high temps have people clamoring for their nearest cooling stations for relief, while other New Yorkers find comfort from this blazing inferno in our local pools. Record usage of electricity and peppered blackouts within the Tri State area have me running to my nearest Green Peace office for enlightenment. My eyebrows and ass crack have never been more moist. I don't know about you guys, but I don't find a sweaty ass cute. [source]