TEQUILLA AND GAY DO NOT MIX...

Last night was one of those nights where everything came together. It was one of those nights where you drink your ass off, and you miraculously dodge the usual hugging of the bowl with a clean getaway. Last night was one of those nights that tested everything I've come to know about my homosexuality... and I rode the wave towards heterosexual shores. My haggy Denise invited some friends over to celebrate... well... just to celebrate. As the night unfolded, all I can remember throughout my Tequilla-induced haze was that I had a smashing time (with heterosexual tendencies galore). I had a fucking ball. The night began when I arrived at Dee's with two bottles of Merlot...

Representing the Yankees to their fullest, I sported my AROD jersey with wild abandon. I entered the house and strutted my manly self (with jersey in full cascade) towards the nearest chair to have my long awaited cigarette. Fully prepared to tune into the already in progress Bombers game, my inner hetero was in overdrive... and the guys arrived at Dee's just in time. The Yankees and their performance (especially Arod's hot azz) became the topic of our discussion, which in turn led to a collective deep-dive into a recap of the players' stats. No less than three minutes into our ball-scratching conversation, the girls cleared the room like prostitutes stay clear of church. Three minutes after that... I followed the ladies... with drink in hand...

As my wine-chugging ceased to commence, I found myself in Denise's backyard canoodling with the ladies... and with a potential, spanking new nominee in hagdom. Giorgianna had full hag aura since my initial encounter with her, so it would be inevitable that I would gravitate towards such a luscious piece of woman. Her low-rise jeans and panties that peeked out as if to say hi, were just enough sugar for my hetero coffee. On my left, I had my primary haggy (Dee), directly in front of me was Aury (another gorgeous Latin bombshell of a hag) and on my right was the new applicant... Giorgianna. I mean, with a name like that, how could I go wrong?

Sure, I don't understand my odd behavior of late, but who the fuck cares. I love being in the company of women (preferably hot ones) and enjoy every quirk and blip of confused arousal that I may experience. Last night was banging and it wouldn't have been the same without Denise's usual verbal raping of me; Aury piercing her ocular gaze into my eyes as if she loves me and only me, and last but not least, the full induction of Giorgianna into the Family Flock of Freaks. Much love to all my hags... and here's to fantasizing about sharing a glass of Merlot with each and every one of you. Love it.